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How to tell if your landing page copy is not working (and how to fix it)

One of the hardest things for early-stage founders looking to gain traction is troubleshooting the copy. They're too close to the product and they don't have an easy and affordable way to test assumptions about what resonates with their target audience.

Result: Defaulting to generic copy or copy that makes sense to them, but doesn’t necessarily explain why their prospects should care or sign up. When this happens, getting customers will be hard even if your product solves an actual, acute problem. Simply because you’re not giving your prospects a good reason to convert.

To improve your landing page, you first need to figure out that something isn't working. Then you have to figure out what isn't working and why. And then you need to fix it.

Here's how.

Finding what's not working

Use tracking tools

To be able to make educated guesses about what’s not working on the page, you need to know what your conversion rate is – and how visitors interact with the page.

There are multiple tools out there that can help with that. The most common setup for my customers is a combination of Google Analytics or Unbounce with Hotjar – but you can use other tools that capture the following information:

  • Bounce rate
  • Time on page
  • Segmentation by mobile/desktop
  • Heatmap
  • Scroll depth
  • Session recordings

There are, of course, privacy concerns to take into consideration. While different tools have different setups, and I can't speak to all of them, Hotjar records customer behavior and/or aggregate data without saving IP addresses or form input data. I personally recommend this if you want to see how prospects interact with your page in real-world conditions.

But if this type of tracking isn't for you, alternative approaches could be:

  • User tests to understand how users will interact with the page
  • 5 second tests to understand if your hero section will resonate
  • Messaging tests, especially if you have a well-defined audience, this can help you both understand what's not working and why, as well as get dozens of ideas on how to fix it.

Regardless of where you get it, you should use the data to pinpoint what's not working and start brainstorming possible solutions.

Importantly, the “what” may not even be copy-related.

Start by checking session recordings and click maps for UX-related gotchas: unclickable buttons, elements that look like buttons but aren't, other frustrating tech issues that are not copy.

If there’s nothing that is getting in the way of your landing page visitors, then it’s time to look at copy-related stuff (that's more fun).

Common landing page issues and how to recognize them

Here are the most common issues and what they may mean:

High bounce rate + low scroll depth:

  • Hero section isn't working, need to rework the hook.
  • If running ads or bringing traffic through socials, the messages may not match, or there may be confusing copy in the hero section.

High scroll depth, low bounce rate, but no conversions:

  • May need to optimize the CTA or the offer as you may have high-friction copy and/or an offer that's not perceived as valuable.

High scroll depth, user sessions show prospects bouncing around the page, low conversions:

  • It's possible that the page is disorganized and doesn't provide the info prospects are looking for.
  • It's possible that the copy is too high-level and lacks in specificity

Fixing the right thing

You should be able to see which sections are not pulling their weight – but it may not be immediately obvious why. The next step is trying to pinpoint what may be the reason for the behaviors that you see on your landing page.

Run a self-audit instead of asking for a roast

Start with answering these high-level questions:

  • Did you write for a specific stage of awareness? Do you have reasons to believe that you were right in writing for that stage of awareness?
  • If you were using a copywriting formula (think PAS, AIDA, etc.) - are you missing steps (going straight to the solution) or ignoring your audience's stage of awareness?

Once you finish that, use Copyhackers’ 7 sweeps to dig into your copy and identify possible weak points based on what you’ve learned about the way your landing page visitors interact with the page.

The problem, of course, is that as a founder, it may be hard for you to objectively evaluate the clarity and the persuasiveness of your copy from the standpoint of your audience.

Start asking smarter questions

Consider not asking the IH community to roast your page (unless they are your target audience). You want feedback from your target audience. And you want targeted feedback that addresses issues they see with your on-page argument, missing information that they want to see, and their objections to moving to the next step, whether it’s a free signup or a demo call.

So instead, ask your audience smarter questions that would help you understand if your guesses about what’s wrong and how to fix it are correct. The possibilities are endless, but here are a few:

  • Hotjar exit pop-up surveys.
  • Wynter bring-your-own-audience panels or paid messaging panels if you don't have easy access to your target audience (or they're not into giving away their opinions for free).
  • 15-minute calls with folks navigating your page IRL. Asking around for volunteers here on IH, in social media communities, requesting introductions through your network, or using a user testing service panel all can work, depending on your audience.

If you're not sure how to find potential customers that would be willing to answer your questions, The Mom Test by @robfitz is a great source of ideas (and also questions that won't lead to biased answers).

The next step is to find the words and arguments that would actually move the needle.

Getting “copy that works” – even if you don’t have customers yet

Where to find inspiration to shift from me-focused copy to customer-focused copy

For early-stage founders, the biggest copy shift is from “This is an awesome product you really need in your life” to “You have this problem in your life that hasn’t had a good solution – until now.”

The second-biggest shift is accepting that your prospects will have objections and hesitations that you’ll need to address, while reminding them why solving this problem is worth the effort.

The easiest way to answer the question “Why is it worth it?” is talking to your existing (or potential) customers.

Here are some additional ways to understand your audience's mindset (if you’re not convinced that it’s worth the effort, one of my clients got a 3x industry average conversion rate through this type of research):

Review mining for competitors’ solutions:

  • What does your target audience actively dislike about existing solutions?
  • What’s missing? How is it relevant to your product?
  • How do these folks describe the problem they’re trying to solve? Can you use this information to align your product with their goals and jobs to be done?

Social media listening:

  • Forums: when your target audience is asking for help with solving relevant problems, how do they describe them? What’s preventing them from finding a solution? What are the pros and cons of existing solutions they discuss?
  • Social media: What are some (strong) opinions about the industry? Any future developments or challenges you can align yourself with? Any conversations that can help you position your product as the best solution for your target audience? Any trends that work in your favor?
  • Any other places your audience is hanging out and discussing the problem you're trying to solve: What are existing beliefs about your product or your product category? Any beliefs about the competitors that are creating resistance to switch? Any beliefs that would work in your favor?

Transforming common landing page into copy that converts

High bounce rate + low scroll depth

Reworking the hook:

  • What (in your target market’s words) is the most annoying thing about the status quo/current solutions?
  • What (in your target market’s words) is the outcome they’re trying to achieve, but can’t? How can your product help them get there?

High scroll depth, low bounce rate, but no conversions

CTA section or the offer:

  • What is the benefit of acting – for your target audience? Is it explicit? Is it aligned with their goals? (“Talk to sales” is not aligned)

Reducing friction:

  • What do your prospects need to believe to act?
  • What are they worried about?
  • What is making them reluctant to act?
  • How can you address this in your copy and decrease the perceived risk, effort, or time-to-value?

High scroll depth, user sessions show prospects bouncing around the page, low conversions

Page structure and information:

  • Is your page following a copywriting formula (not the same as a template)? If not, should it, based on the feedback you’ve received?
  • What info is missing, based on your research? What do you need to add to make sure your target audience gets both what your product does and why they should care?
  • Is the page flow aligned with their stage of awareness (or are you jumping straight into features)?

Specificity:

  • Could this page be describing literally any other SaaS product in the world?
  • If not, could this page have been written by a competitor?
  • If not, are there any SaaS buzzwords or marketing / PR fluffy statements that should be replaced by VoC?
  • Is the updated copy aligned with your target audience’s mindset, stage of awareness, and goals?

Once you’re done making the edits, make sure you go through the 7 sweeps process again, and again, and again. The rule of thumb is: If you don’t loathe your copy by the time you publish it, you haven’t done enough. That may be just me though.

Fixing your copy: process in a nutshell

If you prefer a tl;dr version, here’s what the process looks like:

  • Use quant data to identify which elements are underperforming.
  • Make initial guesses about why they’re not performing well.
  • Gather qualitative feedback to validate those guesses and gather voice-of-customer data.
  • Improve your copy (not forgetting to use Copyhackers’ 7 sweeps to get out of your own way).
  • Monitor results and continue improving your copy based on what you learn about your target audience.
  • If you need to ask for help from your community, make sure you’re asking specific questions, instead of assuming that someone can wave a magic wand and fix your copy without knowing your offer, your audience, and your competitive environment.
posted to Icon for group Growth
Growth
on May 5, 2023
  1. 3

    I want to validate the content with prospect, do you think a blind 10 second test with the user make sense?

    If yes, what are the key questions that I should ask during a user test?

    1. 1

      Not sure what "blind" means in this case - can you tell me more?

      I use 5-second tests to make sure that the hero section is conveying the information that I need it to convey (who it's for, what it does at the very least).

      To validate copy, a full-page test is much more useful, in my opinion. An alternative would be to go live and do a fake-door test paid traffic funnel. The drawback is that you won't be getting as much feedback.

      Let me know what it is that you're trying to validate, and we can work out the most appropriate questions to ask!

      1. 2

        sorry i confused you, should be the 10 sec test, and not giving them any context about my page.

        Thanks for your idea tho! I am now drafting some basic questions and will start recruiting people to do the test with me!

        Should i also ask my potential prospect or should i just test with anyone to check if my content is easy to understand even for people who are not in that industry?

        1. 1

          Sure, glad this was helpful!

          I really don't recommend getting feedback from folks that are not your target market - way too easy to go off-course with irrelevant feedback.

  2. 3

    Thankyou so much! Helpful Post

  3. 3

    Here are some signs that your landing page copy may not be working, as well as some tips on how to fix it:

    High bounce rate: If visitors are leaving your landing page shortly after arriving, it may be an indication that the copy is not engaging or relevant enough. To fix this, consider tweaking the headline or introduction to be more attention-grabbing and relevant to your target audience.

    Low conversion rate: If visitors are not taking the desired action on your landing page (such as filling out a form or making a purchase), it may be an indication that the copy is not persuasive enough. To fix this, try highlighting the benefits of your offer or product, using social proof such as testimonials, and addressing any potential objections that your target audience may have.

    Confusing or unclear messaging: If visitors are confused about what your landing page is offering or how to take action, it may be an indication that the copy is not clear enough. To fix this, try simplifying your messaging and making the call-to-action more prominent and clear.

    Irrelevant or misleading copy: If visitors are expecting one thing based on the ad or email that brought them to your landing page, but the copy on the landing page is focused on something else, it may be an indication that the copy is not aligned with the expectations set by your marketing efforts. To fix this, make sure that the messaging on your landing page is aligned with the messaging used in your ads or emails.

    1. 1

      If you're going to use ChatGPT to generate comments, you may want to at least ask it to adopt a non-default writing structure and tone of voice :)

  4. 2

    Great post @EkaterinaHoward !

    Regarding the qualitative testing, I started using ChatGPT to come up with sentiment analysis.

    Here is how it goes:

    • I first speak with potential customers and record my sessions with English captions. I ask general questions to understand their problems in my field of testing and then I share the link to my landing page which has the draft value propositions of the products I intend to build.
    • When the captions text is available, I process them to get rid of the unnecessary conversations in the user testing.
    • I paste the remaining caption texts in CHATGPT and ask for sentiment analysis for the user's comments.
    • I also ask CHATGPT to suggest potential areas of development by analyzing the user's comments.
    • At the end of the analysis, CHATGPT comes up with a sentiment score out of 10 for that particular user-testing session.

    I cannot say that CHATGPT is very steady in its sentiment analysis however it is a good starting point.

    When the overall sentiment analysis reaches 9/10, we will be building that product :)

  5. 2

    Thank you, my biggest takeaways are use the customers voice and does it sound like any SAAS product/your competitor?

    1. 1

      Yes - as long as we're not getting into the "Be the Liquid Death of accounting software" territory and alienate prospects with a too-different ToV and/or branding

  6. 2

    I am learning to build landing pages and your post is an excellent guide. Loved it. Thanks for writing this.

  7. 2

    Great points Ekaterina! I especially love the emphasis on using both quantitative and qualitative data to pinpoint where the issues lie. It's a reminder that effective copy isn't about flashy language, but understanding your audience. And totally agree that asking for specific help is a game changer, rather than expecting an instant "fix-all" solution. Thanks for the insights!

  8. 2

    Great write up! I find a lot of landing page feedback is like "I don't like this" with no deeper reason why, so being systematic like this is helpful

    1. 1

      Yes, "I don't like this" is not helpful. One way around this is to ask more specific feedback questions - but still, if you get feedback from the folks that are not a part of your audience, it can lead you seriously astray.

  9. 2

    Thanks for sharing. This is the new good methods for me.

    1. 1

      Awesome, @stwboom! Let me know if you have any questions.

      1. 2

        Have a great day.

        If it's appropriate, we just adapt this method, can I ask any thing that can be improved, Ekaterina https://kaikul.com/.

        1. 1

          In this case, as a prospective user I'd want to know the following:

          • WIIFM - ultimate desired outcome?
          • What's the pain point you're solving and why is it better than the alternatives (journaling? I don't know)
          • Does it work for all / any goals?
          • What makes this a beta version? Will I have to pay for it later?

          That said, your prospective users may have different questions, depending on who they are and how they perceive this pain point - there are some very interesting different themes in testimonials, so I'd start by figuring out the stage of awareness of your prospective users and see if the current page is aligned with it.

          1. 2

            Thank you so much Ekaterina Howard!

  10. 2

    Great read! Thanks for sharing.

  11. 2

    Excellent guide for improving landing page copy and conversion. It highlights the need to understand and address the audience's needs, shifting the narrative from product-focused to customer-centric. Emphasizing the use of tracking tools, it encourages looking beyond data to understand user behavior. It also suggests asking smarter, more targeted questions for actionable feedback. This advice is invaluable for early-stage founders looking to optimize their landing pages. Thanks for sharing!

  12. 2

    Love the important reminder: talk about the problem, not the idea.

    Feel free to roast my landing page (I put it together in under an hour to test my service idea)
    lemonleverage.com

    1. 1

      What's your market saying, @tomscourfield1?

      If I had to guess, I'd say these would be the most common objections:

      • Why should we trust you and work with you? (As opposed to going on Upwork / asking for referrals / going online to find someone)
      • Have you helped startups like mine in the past? What do they say about working with you?
      • Do I have to get on a call?
      • Where do you source the agencies / freelancers? Are they legit? What does "vetting" mean?
      • How will you get founders to the front of the queue with the best agencies? What does "best" mean? Also: startup budget vs "best agency" fees - are they even within our price range?
  13. 2

    Now, imagine doing all these things, using all your energies, and launching a landing page for a product that nobody wanna buy.

    It hurts. And that’s literally my experience last year. I launched 2-3 products without selling even $1.

    For this year, I decided to launch EarlyAccess.to to solve that specific problem I had. I built this product for myself, because I didn’t want to invest my time and energy into something that’s made of uncertainties.

    Note: not contradicting the author of this post, just sharing some thoughts.

    1. 1

      Yes, definitely extremely painful - and this is what initial discovery and "The Mom Test" are for - de-risking the launch so that you're reasonably confident in going live with a product idea that is (reasonably) solid.

  14. 2

    This was darn good to read! Thanks a ton!

  15. 2

    This is so helpful. Great read.

  16. 2

    Thanks for sharing.

  17. 2

    This is amazing stuff!! So insightful!

  18. 2

    This is great. the value of improving and running tests on your landing pg is key

    top of funnel -> convert -> retain

    1. 1

      Thank you, @startuprabbithole! And retention is so much easier if your landing page is set up to attract and convert your ideal prospects

  19. 2

    Wow, packed with insight. I use something other than HotJar to capture session recordings but your suggestions on how to interpret different user behaviors were priceless.

  20. 2

    Great article ! we wrote also about this topic in our biweekly newsletter https://friendsofsaas.substack.com/p/saas-landing-page

  21. 2

    Super insightful, thanks for sharing!

  22. 2

    Thank you so much for your help.

  23. 2

    Thanks! I will implement it to my site.

    1. 1

      Awesome, @isabellopez12! Let us know how it goes!

  24. 2

    Directly to bookmarks!
    You've added a lot of value here, THANK YOU.

  25. 2

    Thank you! I used it and iterated on my landing page for Shelf.nu

    1. 2

      Hey! This is random but I just had a look at your website and it looks great, I love the visuals!
      One thing I noticed, if you are interested, is that the "Everything" in the title is kind of vague considering it seems to be about assets / inventory - only understood it once I read further. Maybe it helps:)

    2. 1

      You're very welcome! What have you changed & why?

      (No pressure to share - just curious!)

  26. 2

    Great post! This will help us to validate our latest landing page for our product launching. (qmute .me)

    1. 1

      Thank you! What are you hoping to validate, @christiancanlubo?

      1. 2

        We're currently building qmute.+me website

  27. 2

    This is indeed incredibly written! There's rarely a few write-ups out there that explains each domain so well.

  28. 2

    Nice in-depth post!

    If you want better privacy and a lot cheaper pricing for high volume, check out my self-hosted Hotjar alternative: https://uxwizz.com
    You also replace Google Analytics at the same time and can A/B test your copy.

    1. 1

      @EkaterinaHoward You can DM me on Twitter if you are interested in a collaboration, as I think your audience might be interested in using such a product (that is a basically cheaper and better Hotjar).

      1. 1

        Thank you for sharing, @XCS! "Better" in which way?

        1. 2

          See this (older) comparison page: https://www.uxwizz.com/hotjar-alternative

          The main difference: with Hotjar you have to also use another analytics platform, with UXWizz you get everything needed in one platform.

          Regarding the Hotjar-specific features, for exmaple the Heatmaps, in UXWizz the heatmaps are dynamically stored and generated, so you can generate heatmaps for specific user segements and compare them (e.g. see a heatmap for the landing page for the users that came from search vs from social media).

          Also, UXWizz comes with two different recording systems that you can choose from (a lightweight approximate one and a more accurate one).

          All of this, on top of being able to track thousands of daily sessions without paying the thousands of dollars per month that Hotjar would cost.

  29. 2

    Pay attention to the metrics and behavior of your website visitors, and conduct A/B testing to identify what works and what doesn't. Look for opportunities to improve the clarity, relevance, and persuasiveness of your messaging, and make sure your copy aligns with your target audience's needs and interests.

  30. 2

    The article provides guidance on how to troubleshoot the copy on your landing page to improve conversions. The author suggests using tracking tools, such as Google Analytics and Hotjar, to gather data on bounce rates, time on page, segmentation by mobile/desktop, heatmap, scroll depth, and session recordings. The data can help identify issues with the landing page, including copy-related ones. The article provides a list of common issues and how to recognize them, such as high bounce rate with low scroll depth indicating that the hero section isn't working and needs a rework. To fix the copy, the author suggests running a self-audit and using Copyhackers' 7 sweeps to identify possible weak points. To get feedback from your target audience, the author suggests asking smarter questions, such as through Hotjar exit pop-up surveys, Wynter bring-your-own-audience panels, or 15-minute calls with users navigating your page. The goal is to find the words and arguments that would actually move the needle and improve conversions, even if you don't have customers yet.

  31. 2

    Great article, I am using chatGPT to write my copy atm. I was thinking about testing multiple variations of the websites and their content. I feel like getting multiple variations of what to have in it is very simple nowadays. But I just finished the landing page today and will try to run the first campaigns next week.

    1. 1

      Thank you, @JacobFreedom! Yes, creating multiple variations is definitely easy these days. What is (still) hard, in my opinion, is making sure that the variations have meaningful differences and that you're starting off with solid hypotheses.

      I've had conversations with founders about testing where their strategy was basically "Let's tinker with h1 and see what sticks" - and my biggest concern here is that this way you don't learn - and so the next test will still be basically guessing.

      Not saying this is the case for you, just something I happen to be thinking about a lot these days. :)

      1. 2

        Sure, but isn't A/B the right way to do it? I feel that the most important part is just starting from something and then seeing how it works. Maybe it also depends a lot on what stage you're in, but we just launched our landing page and will start with campaigns tomorrow to see if there's an interest in it.

        If it doesn't work at all we will kill it, if it works, then we will try to keep adjusting the copy to achieve better and better results. I think that this is the stage where you should start thinking about it more. But I'll be more than happy to hear your thoughts on it :)

        1. 1

          Totally makes sense for testing out the initial idea!

          To be honest, I don't think there's one right way to optimize copy. It depends on so many things, from your budget to traffic to the market. If the A/B test is really well-defined, achieves statistical significance, and has clear take-aways to build on - awesome! Some of my clients don't get a lot of traffic, so for them a messaging test is a better fit.

  32. 2

    Excellent write-up! Totally agree on using the market's language when writing copy.

    Here's a quick way to do it:

    • Collect feedback from user tests, email surveys, Hotjar, etc.
    • Put all that feedback into a word cloud generator.
    • Try to write headlines, subheads, and intro copy based on the most frequent words.

    It's super simple and keeps your copy focused on the subjects that matter, while speaking the language of the market.

    1. 1

      Thank you, @FunnelCandy! Interesting approach - do you also use word clouds for finding headline angles?

      1. 2

        @EkaterinaHoward, yep, it works extremely well. Cross-reference your word cloud with classic headline angles.

        For example, let's say your word cloud shows the words "struggle", "frustrated", and "drive revenue."

        You can write an intro headline like this:

        "For frustrated copywriters struggling to drive revenue..."

        That line ensures your prospect will relate—and keep reading.

        Here's an easy way to get this info: ask this question in an email survey: "What is your biggest challenge with <insert>?"

        Then put those answers into the word cloud. Boom. Now you're relating the prospect's problems in their own words.

        Powerful stuff.

  33. 2

    Super useful! I will say, one thing I really underestimated was copy. I assumed if you hit on some big points conversions were more likely, but even the smallest changes in website copy can make a huge difference!

    1. 1

      Thank you, @shreyasiyer! Very true - and while big points definitely matter, sometimes it's the small changes that help move folks towards converting

  34. 2

    @EkaterinaHoward what are your go-to questions that you always ask customers/prospects regardless of the product?

    1. 1

      That really depends on the project, @fleur_inthecity. :)

      If I had to pick 5 questions that are useful across , I'd say:

      • What has prompted you to start looking for a product?
        (Pain point + trigger event; customers + prospects)

      • What other products / solutions have you considered?
        (Competing solutions + reasoning behind their selection process; customers + prospects)

      • What, if anything, differentiates our product from competitors' products / solutions?
        (What do customers actually care about vs what we think they care about; customers only)?

      • If you were to describe our product in one sentence to a colleague, what would you say?
        (What is one big thing customers focus on; customers only - especially relevant for early-stage startups)

      • Where do you hang out online?
        (Sources for learning more about your audience + finding prospects; customers + prospects)

  35. 2

    Good stuff! I appreciate the detailed if/then breakdowns. 💪

  36. 1

    I use 5-second tests to make sure that the hero section is conveying the information that I need it to convey (who it's for, what it does at the very least).
    To validate copy, a full-page test is much more useful, in my opinion. An alternative would be to go live and do a fake-door test paid traffic funnel. The drawback is that you won't be getting as much feedback. so, you text me more about information
    Let me know what it is that you're trying to validate, and we can work out the most appropriate questions to ask!

  37. 1

    Very complete information, it can be used as a dictionary for reference.

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